There are days when I hear love songs and feel like they’re not meant for me. The lyrics that talk about being cherished, chosen, pursued—they sound sweet, but only for people who are in love. People who have someone. People who are wanted.
But what about someone like me?
I’m not in love. I don’t even have prospects. Sometimes, I catch myself wondering, Is there something wrong with me? Am I not pretty enough? Because it seems like others get attention so easily, while I remain invisible. It’s like no one even looks in my direction.
And I’d be lying if I said it doesn’t hurt.
Sometimes, I want to cry. But what would crying change? Would it make someone suddenly care? I doubt it. If they don’t want me, I can’t force them to.
That’s a hard truth I’ve had to swallow again and again.
The Pain of Being Unseen
I’ve been in relationships before, but none of them turned out the way I hoped. Either they didn’t take me seriously, or I wasn’t truly ready myself. But whatever the case, nothing ever felt real or lasting.
It’s exhausting.
There are nights when my thoughts spiral, and I think, Maybe I’m just meant to be alone. Maybe I’ll grow old without ever experiencing the kind of love I hear in songs or read about in books. Maybe I’m not the type who gets pursued or chosen.
And deep down, I wonder: If I were beautiful, wouldn’t someone have noticed me by now?
Choosing a Different Kind of Love
In the middle of all this emotional noise, I remember a story from the Bible—about Leah, the first wife of Jacob. She wasn’t the one Jacob loved. He loved Rachel. And yet, Leah longed for her husband’s affection.
She tried everything to earn his love. But eventually, she shifted her focus. Instead of constantly chasing human affection, she poured her heart into loving God—the only One who could truly love her unconditionally.
And maybe that’s what I need to do too.
Maybe, instead of sitting in pain, waiting for someone to notice me, I can start leaning into the One who has always seen me. The One who never overlooks me.
God.
Redefining Love and Self-Worth
There’s a certain kind of ache that comes from being overlooked, especially as a woman. Society often measures our worth by our relationship status. You’re expected to be admired, pursued, “chosen.”
But what happens when you’re not?
Does that make you less valuable?
The truth is—no.
My worth isn’t defined by who wants me or doesn’t. My value doesn’t rise or fall based on whether someone sends me a good morning text or brings me flowers.
I matter because God says I matter.
I’m worthy of love because He created me with purpose, intention, and beauty—even if the world fails to see it.
Faith in the Middle of the Ache
Being single can be beautiful, but it can also be lonely. Especially when rejection feels constant, when you scroll through your feed and see everyone getting engaged, married, or celebrated by someone else.
It’s painful.
But I hold onto this: God sees every tear. He hears every whispered prayer. He knows the silent ache I carry.
When no one else notices, He does.
When no one chooses me, He already has.
Healing One Day at a Time
There are still moments when I feel the sting. When I catch myself wishing for a “someone” to share life with. When I see a couple walking hand in hand, and feel that ache rise up in my chest.
But slowly, I’m learning not to let those feelings define me.
I’m learning that healing doesn’t mean the pain vanishes overnight. Sometimes, it just means choosing to get up every day and believe—believe that I am loved, believe that my life has meaning, even without a partner right now.
And maybe, someday, someone will come.
But until then, I’ll keep loving myself. I’ll keep trusting God.
A Love Song for the Soul
So the next time I hear a love song, maybe I won’t turn away in pain. Maybe I’ll let it be a reminder—not just of what I don’t have, but of what I do.
The love of a God who never overlooks.
The love that never fades, never depends on beauty, status, or validation from others.
The love that sees me, even when I feel invisible.
Final Thoughts
If you’re reading this and feel unseen, unwanted, or tired of waiting—please know you’re not alone. Your pain is valid. Your story matters.
You are loved more deeply than you know.
Not because of what you look like, or what others say about you.
But because God sees the whole of you—and still calls you worthy.You’re not forgotten.
You’re not invisible.
You are deeply, endlessly loved. 💛
